An alternative life
by KL08
Summary: What happens when one person can't stand it anymore, can't hold these secrets any longer? Run away? Reveal everything? Jack/Amanda, Jack/Emily. After 2 X 04
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything! So this is my first fanfictio.. Tell me what you think!**

**Emily **:

Oh. My. God. I can't help but smile inside… I'm kind of in shock, let down a tear or two but who cares, I'm alone. I've heard my _mom's_ voice for the first time in years… I might actually get a chance at this, finding her…after thinking she was dead for so many years. I mean, who would have thought I would hear her voice thanks to white haired man who tried to kill me more than once? Obviously not me. Of all things I can plan, this wasn't one. If he weren't dead, I'd thank him Well not directly of course, it'd be too friendly… But I do owe him, although it doesn't change the fact that he did kill my father… I guess we're even.

Anyways… Hearing my mom's voice is nothing at all actually. I have to continue seeking this complete revenge I've been planning for years, for him. So that people might, one day, when I'm done, realize that David Clarke wasn't the bad guy; they were…

But… What if Nolan was right? I could try living this happy life many people talk about. A normal life, normal family, real friends… Of course, family wouldn't be _normal_ considering the situation, but I could still try… Maybe mom isn't in such bad shape, we could talk things through. But she did abandon me, she knew I was alive…

Anyways, I've got to talk to Nolan about this, it's huge news! Or maybe not, he is going to tell me to finally live my life and move on but I can't, I just can't. I hope. I have to keep being strong, like they taught me : no feelings, no problems.

**Amanda **:

That hurt. Jack telling me he couldn't commit to me anymore. It was just the anger talking… He couldn't really mean it. And I get why he's mad, hell even I'm mad! Why did Emily have to get me to do this. She's so manipulative… I have to get him to forgive me somehow…

But I still can't believe it! How is it possible… Being pregnant with a guy I only slept once, a one night stand. I didn't think Emily would actually have to false the results on this one (she's nice once and again). She's done it thousands of other times for ID and stuff, but for my own child, who I thought came from the man I love… I feel sick at the simple thought of lying to him again, and lying to this child later on, knowing that he'll never know his real father. It's awful, I don't even know the father's name! And what if Jack figures it out, I mean it'll show in a few years that they don't look alike… I can't do this to him, definitely not. But I can't lose him. He asked the paternity test, is it because he's staying with me only because of this child? Especially afetr what he said just a few minutes ago… If so, he won't ever be happy with me, just staying because he has to. And if I tolf him this baby wasn't his, maybe he would actually stay with me… We do love eachother right?

**Nolan** :

Gosh I can't take this anymore! I hate when I come so close to death I can feel it coming to get me. It's awful, it's not the kind of adrenaline that keeps you're heart beating in a fun way, it's really, really bad. First the white haired guy, now this ally guy… If it weren't for Emily, her little friend there would've killed me!

Why doesn't she stop this little game of hers… This is so not what David wanted for her. He just wanted her to keep being that kind little happy girl she was. If she can't realize that, maybe I should make her realize the hard way. I know I promised David Clarke to help her whatever her choices were, but her choices are just so awful… It's almost inhuman…

**Nolan**:

Okay… I've slept on it, and I can't teach her the hard way… she'd definitely find a way to kill me in my sleep. I am going to talk to her though, she won't get out of this. Or maybe I…

''Hello?'' I answered the phone.

''Hey! I need you to do me a favor.'' Ems asked in a hurried voice. She sounded quite stressed out…

''Ugghh…Can we talk?''

''Come on I don't have time for this, it's kind of striking …''

''Go on…'' I was intrigued. Something striking for Emily?! That's got to be huge. For all I know being held captive wasn't striking for her.

''My mom'' said Emily in a shaking voice, ''I heard her.''

''What you're psych now? Wow… I guess this story really does make you a new person!'' I didn't actually believe this, it's impossible. Her mom. We found her medication, well we think, on the white haired man, but it's impossible he would of kept her this close to Emily, it would be to easy to reach her.

'' You think I'm crazy now? I HEARD her Nolan! I listened to her voice on the white haired man's voicemail, I was right, they really _knew_ eachother… I need you to find out where she called from.'' Ems was really excited. Happy excited. That was a first.

''Crazy… Always thought you were and you just keep on getting worst! You know, who can actually have no feelings for anyone? Anywho… for the phone, come by my place I'll try working on it. It's for a good cause for once…is it?''

''Yes Nolan, and it has always been for good reasons and you know it better than anyone!'' She said it as if she really believed it. How could she? What she did was not seeking justice, she was completely destroying people. Revenge…

''Yeah, yeah. And _you_ know what _I_ think about those reasons. _Stupid_'' I whispered.

''Bye Nolan.'' She hung up. I think she heard my whisper. In my defense, her revenge _is_ stupid.

And maybe she will get away with it… Again.

**Emily** :

Ouff! So close to getting that long monologue about how bad revenge is… Maybe I actually wanted to hear it, cause I feel kind of weird now. I feel like even Nolan is starting to go along with me, it doesn't feel right. I still need that one sain person around me to tell me what's right and what's not, even if I don't do what he says…

Ok. So now the phone thing is set. Victoria thinks I'm on her side, I will keep her little secret. Thing is, it's only to maybe use it against her sometime if she gets in my way. You know. Anonymous letters can be very effective when Victoria has got so many other people that could want to harm her. She wouldn't even think that my poor self would send her a letter like that. She just hates me because she tought I wanted her family's money. Turns out it's not quite what I want. I want much more, she'll dream I only wished for the money one day…

XXXXXXXXXXXX

**I hope you liked it. So what did you think? Review please :D**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey! So this is the next chapter, sorry if they are so short. I hope you like it though :) (I don't own anything.)**

**XXXXXXXXXXXX**

**Amanda **:

''Jack?'' I asked from the bar after opening the door. It seemed deserted, no sound of any kind. Then I heard the floor crack. He was obviously just avoiding me.

''Jack. I know you're there I hear you. I really need to talk to you. Listen I'm really sorry for everything.'' I was starting to get impatient. ''Come on Jack it's really important!''

And there I saw him coming down the stairs as handsome as always. More distant though. ''Hey Amanda.'' No sweet talk anymore. How do I handle this?

''Can we sit?''

''Yeah sure.'' He still manages to pull out a chair for me. He might be mad, but he's always a gentleman. ''So. What is so important?''

I felt my heart that started racing and I could feel it beat in my whole body. Damn I was stressed out. I better just blurt it out, but it's just going to make it sound way worst. ''Jack.'' I closed my eyes a little while. He looked at me with a big question mark on his face.

''I'm not…'' This is way harder than I thought it would be. ''The baby isn't your's.'' I couldn't say a word more. He just kept looking at me, so surprised. He even seemed a little disappointed…

After a few minutes he manages to say a little ''Ok.''

''OK ? That's all you have to say? Aren't you going to react or something?'' I wasn't expecting that.

''How do you want me to react? I'm pissed off and you know it to damn well so why should I waste my time and energy over you huh? ''

''I understand Jack. And I understand you're mad… I didn't want this child to live without a father, without the man I love. I will never…never forgive myself for not telling you earlier but i really thought it was your's Jack please understand my point here…''

The door opened. Declan came in and asked to talk to his brother, certainly not knowing what he just interrupted. Jack got up to his brother and started whispering. I stood up too… and left. I was only hurting him and I'm pretty sure he wanted me to leave so I just got up and to the door.

**Nolan** :

This man knew what he was doing. He pretty much secured everything on his path, even Em's mother's cellphone. Finding where she was when she called is so much more complicated than it usually is. Anyways, since I'm a born genius I still managed to find a way around it. I had to use the company's computers and satellite stuff but at least it worked. After 6 hours. Emily just owes me one now. Again.

After all the things I've done for her, shouldn't she juste listen to me sometimes. Doesn't she see that people really care about her. I know I do, and her father did. And I'm pretty sure he'd want her to move past this and live her life. Jack is really friendly with her, and he doesn't even know she's actually his childhood friend, imagine if he did. I mean… look what happened with Amanda. The point is, she could really have a good and happy life.

Enough Emily thinking, I should just call her to tell her the news. I think I'm going to text her instead, give her the address of the motel, let her live her moment of happiness.

''Thanks'' is all she answers. I guess she left as soon as she saw this.

**Jack **:

''Can we just talk a little later Declan, I was kind of in the middle of something.''

''Yeah… not to long though I really need some help here. I really don't want to go to jail because of some stupid friend that convinced me to steal for the money and that doesn't even give me my share so I could give it back to the man!''

''I'll see what I can do Dec, see you later.'' I cut it short because I wanted to just talk with Amanda. Not get back with her, just thank her for telling me. If it weren't for that, I would've had to keep her in my life in some way just to take care of this child. I'm not sure I would've been happy. Never thought so since the second she got here pregnant after the wonderful time I had just had with Emily… So I just ran to the door.

''Wait Amanda! Amanda! Amanda stop!'' It took her a few seconds to hear me and turn around. She seemed really sad…

''Look Amanda. We are over and you well know it. But I don't want things to just end up like it was about to. Just… take care of yourself ok? It might not be my child, but I want you to love him like I know you love him. Family is important... and thank you for telling me. Just so you know, I would've loved this child anyway, but I don't love you anymore… I just couldn't live with myself if I had to raise this child in a family with no love..''

Well that's out. Feels kind of good. Ending things after so much time. I didn't do because I had to stay with her for this baby.

''That's what I was scared would happen.'' She let a few tears roll down her cheeks. ''I really loved you, you know. I'm really sorry for everything.''

''I'm sorry too Amanda.''

She looked at me pretty intense at that right moment. ''I figure since I'm letting out secrets I should tell you…My name isn't Amanda. Since things are over you should probably know that.''

Yeah right sh'es not Amanda. Funny. She wants to joke around now? ''What's all this about now? I'm not really in the mood Amanda..''

''My name is Emily Thorne. Has been Amanda Clarke has for the last couple years though. Just not THE Amanda Clarke. I'm really sorry for all this nonsense…''

''Emily Thorne. Is this some kind of jealousy act? I think you should leave.'' I was getting pretty mad right now.

''Ask Nolan. Or just figure it out yourself Jack. Thing is, this isn't just some jealousy act, it's way…. Way bigger than that.''

''Get out now!'' And she left. I just couldn't believe her! How could she get Emily right into this. She's been her only friend in the last weeks and she still says nonsense things like this.

**Emily** :

As soon as I saw Nolan's text I left. On the spot. The plan for the Grayson's will be delayed a little, but that isn't my priority right now.

I brought the picture of my mom with me just in case. It was about 20 minutes from the house before I got there. I went to the reception and asked if they saw the woman on the picture. Guess what? They did. Second guess? She's gone.

She left early this morning. I guess she really followed the white haired man's orders to every detail. She must've shut down everything now, whatever everything is. I told the woman at the reception that the I was looking for my mother (which wasn't me lying to get to someone for once) and asked if I could go and look in her room. The receptionist didn't hesitate at all before giving me the keys. I guess having mother/daughter looks helped a little in this case.

I took the key and went to the room. As I guessed, it was pretty empty. But I know better than to just give a quick glance. If the white haired man had something to do here, he certainly didn't let things out in plain sight. I look under the matress. Nothing there. Cleaning ladies would've found it. The central air trap was empty. Nothing under the lamps, windows, tv…

Where could they hide something? Anything… I was lost in my reflection when I realised what I was looking at. The carpet. It was a little flipped over in the corner.

I went to it, wondering what I would find. And there it was.

**XXXXXXXXXX**

**So what did you think? What do you think happens next? Review :) Thanks !**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey ! Sorry if it took a while.. I hope you enjoy this chapter :)  
(I don't own anything)**

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XX**

**Emily **:

A simple letter to some people, but my mother's handwriting to me.

_To whoever finds this, I am fine. Even with all that has happened lately. Nothing can bring me down anymore. Minutes of my life it seems now were destroyed by tragedy. Everyone feels this way some day. A complete change in life. So good you that you finally feel free. There I am right now, in this freedom of spirit where I can finally live. Where I was before wasn't a good place for me_.

It didn't actually make any sense. What is this? He, for sure, did not tell her to… you know… At least I hope not. That would be the worst that could happen…

Why did she leave this behind?

**Charlotte** :

It's the 4th time I read this journal. The one my sister gave to me. There's got to be something more. This can't be the only things I know about my father. For all I know, I can't believe the stories that have been going on about him and his supposed crimes. Every one says he's so evil, that he was a bad man with a twisted mind and a bad heart.

How could they say that? I know I've never actually known him, but this journal. It's amazing, to me at least. All his feelings are in here. He loved his family. He love my mother. He loved me…

When I think the only reason I will never get the chance to know my father is because my mom was to afraid to get out of her marriage at that time, it makes me so mad. He wanted to know me, be there for me. He didn't want this other man taking care of me. Dad was there for me, but he wasn't my real father. My father ''didn't want me near Conrad'' is what he wrote. I wish I knew why…

I don't know why it made me _so_ mad at first. I didn't really mean to burst out to my mom like that, but she's the one who kept me from knowing David Clarke. He really thought she loved him as much as he loved her. But she was so selfish. She only thought about herself. Sure she claims she didn't want to break down the family, but it already was in first place when she started having an affair! If she would have broke things off with dad (Conrad), I still would've had my brother of course but added to that a loving father and a sister. And she kept it all away from me.

David Clarke seems broke down in this journal. I really wish he gave more details. Except for saying that ''Victoria wasn't who she said she was'' and that she broke his heart and destroyed his life and everything… And he sure did love that Amanda of his.

Thinking about Amanda makes me sad now. She just texted me an hour ago. She's leaving… I was so happy to be an aunt to her child… But she won't be here anymore. One more family member I can check off my list…

**Nolan **:

When I came downstairs from my room, I didn't expect Jack to be at my door about to knock.

''Hey Jack! What brings you here?''

''I've got something to ask you, if you don't mind.'' He seemed uncomfortable a little…

''Yeah sure, what's going on?''

''Well… my brother. He kind of got into some trouble with this guy and…''

''And you need money.'' Why else would he be here? It's pretty obvious. He is my friend but he doesn't come by down here very often.

''Umm… yeah… not much though. It's just that with the bar and stuff, we don't have that kind of money right now. But I'll pay back every cent.''

''Oh come on Jack. I bought your boat don't you remember? And it's still yours for all I know. Do you really think you need to pay me back ? What are friends for man?'' I said it joking, he was a little to tense so I wanted to lighten things up a little. Turns out he didn't laugh. Anyways…

''Well thanks Nolan, I don't know what I could do to thank you!'' He was very grateful. What a good person I am. Aaahhh come on you can't say it's not true right?

''No need to. So what's been going on with you? Haven't seen you, well, really talked to you in a while?'' I brought him and myself drinks and we headed outside.

''Well. Cut things off with Amanda. Turns out the baby wasn't mine. I was actually kind of relieved…is that a bad thing?''

''Oh I know a whole lot about bad things, and this really isn't that big of a deal…'' If he only knew what _Amanda_ was really into… ''So how do you feel, being alone after those few months?''

''Umm.. kind of freaked out actually. I mean, it was brutal. I didn't think it'd hurt Amanda _that_ much. She was so mad, she even got some jealousy act you know. I've never seen someone make up such stories out of madness I mean, she was crazy!'' he just said it in one breath. Guess it was pretty exceptionnal then…

''What did she say to make you freak out so much…''

''Something about her being Emily Thorne…'' I couldn't help but choke on the sip I just took of my drink. What the hell.

''I know! Crazy right?'' So he didn't believe her… didn't seem that strange to me. But I've known about it for long time so I guess it would seem stupid on his side…

''Yeah….. where'd she get that from huh….Anywho, I think you should go and give this money to your brother now, you know, so he doesn't get in more trouble…'' I tried my best to stay calm and just seem totally normal; it worked.

''You're right, wouldn't want the man to change his mind and call the cops after all! See you later Nolan, and thanks again!''

As he walked away, I immediately took my phone and called Emily. She had to know that Amanda revealed everything, but that her secret was safe. Just a warning in case she might have told other people.

''Hey Ems!''

''Hi Nolan.'' She seemed concentrated elsewhere, but I didn't take it in consideration.

''Listen to this. Amanda told Jack about you two switching identities. She told him her real name was Emily Thorne. At least, hear this, he doesn't believe one second of it!''

''Thanks for warning…'' I didn't hear the rest of here sentence because I shut off the phone. The only thing I heard was Jack behind me, confused quite a bit.

''Am I going nuts Nolan? Or are you just making me believe that I am? You mean… all this is true then?''

I couldn't answer that directly, Ems would kill me. I just gave him a big happy innocent smile. ''What? What are you talking about Jack?''

''Nevermind, I guess I misunderstood what you said there on the phone. Anyways, you forgot to, you know, give me the money so…'' Relief, change of subject.

''Oh yeah. Oops! Wait a sec I'll go and get that for you.'' I ran quickly upstairs and took out the money. I came back down not long after and handed him the money. ''Now you tell that brother of your's that I won't always pay his things off like that…haa joking, I probably would…''

''Yeah but I'm going to make pretty damn sure he doesn't do it again anyways. Thanks!'' and he left again, not even mentionning the incident that happened only a few minutes ago. Thank god he believed me on that one!

I got so scared. What if he did know someday? How would he react? How would this whole thing turn out? Would this all be over, or would it just make things worse… I don't think Ems is ready for this. I hope everyone will know some day of course, but I don't think this is the right time. I believe a wise man once said that for everything there is a season and time…

**Emily** :

I always tell myself I can't give up on something untill I find the answer to it. But I'm starting to think that's stupid. I've read my mom's letter or whatever you want to call it over one hundred times. I still can't figure it out. It never takes me this long. What's going on with me…

I stared down at the infinity times infinity sign in the wood, the one my dad carved what seems like a lifetime ago. I've got no family anymore if I can't find my mom. I've got Nolan. Friend but kind of like family. You know, how you can hate family one day but never want them to actually leave you. That's how I feel about Nolan. I need him to tell me what to do even if I pretty much ignore everything he says. I just need to find her…

It's also pretty obvious that Nolan's call didn't help my concentration either. What is wrong with her? I thought Amanda and I were friends, at least we used to be. She was my only family back in Juvi. She knew everything I went through and I helped her out too. We used to be like sisters. But then she stayed here longer than I had planned for her to stay. This whole thing with Jack… Not like it really changed anything for me… but it kind of did. He is my friend so… him having a baby with her and him not even knowing the real her, just seems awful to me.

And then, lost in my thoughts, I heard a familiar voice that seemed to be coming out of a dream.

xxxxxxx

_''Bet you can't catch me!'' the little girl said laughing. _

_''Ohhh come on Mango you know I can catch up with you!'' _

_Two little kids running in the sand, having so much fun with their dog, drawing and writing in the sand…_

_''Stop calling me that __**Jackie**__!'' she said wanting to tease him. _

_She knew he hated when she called him that, as much as she hated being called Mango, but she still thought it was funny._

xxxxxx

Then I realise I really heard it. Mango. That one nickname nobody ever knew of. It was kind of stupid really. And then it hit me. Jack. Jack knew.

I turned around, my face as white as snow, only to find Jack looking too deep into my eyes. Just the way he used to do it while our ''try not to laugh'' constests.

''Jack'' is all I could say for the moment.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

**So? What did you think on this one?  
And if you guys have something you'd like to see in this story just tell me and I'll try to put it in here somehow :) **

**Review please :) What's next ...? **


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey guys! I'm so sorry if it was this long before an update... I hope you like this chapter, give me your thoughts about it please :)  
So I'm in exam period right now so I might update next during Christmas vacation :)**

_**-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-**_

**Emily** :

''Amanda. Emily…? '' he looked confused. ''I obviously don't know how to call you anymore…''

''Emily. Jack… I'm not…'' I had trouble talking for the moment. After so many months of being Emily to him, it felt weird for him to know the real me. ''I'm not the little innocent girl I used to be Jack… I changed… Life changed me and I can't go back to being little Mango…'' It hurt when I said that. I so wish I _could_ go back to being that little girl.

''I know you're not. Not to be impolite here but how could you after your family was torn appart like that… After everything you know… I'm really sorry for eveything that happened to you but...''

''You don't know half of it…'' I felt like telling him every single detail about everything, but I couldn't. It would stop me from going forward.

''Why did you do this? I mean… Why bother exchaging your identity with… this is so confusing… with Amanda… to come back here? Why did you pretend to be another person all along? I've been thinking of you since the day they got you hoping to see you again, trying to feel something for Amanda when she got here and couldn't… and I only get to know why now…Because she wasn't actually who she said she was… And then you… why didn't you tell my that night in your house? How could you keep this a secret from me? From everyone?''

''Stop. Don't think any further Jack. You can't talk to anyone about this ok? I really hope I can trust you on this. I didn't tell you because of this exactly… I can't risk this getting known by other people. Not that I haven't _wanted_ to tell you… I just _can't_. And that night, it was real to me Jack…not because my name is Emily that the little Amanda inside me isn't there all the time…''

''Ok ok… but tell me why is it so important Emily? Why…'' He really seemed sad for not knowing this earlier. He also looked a little frustrated, I hope he wasn't too mad…

''You won't like it…'' He kept looking at me, waiting for what i would say next. ''As you know, they took my dad to prison. They took me to a psychiatric hospital because I said my father was innocent.''

It was getting hard to talk about this… It was actually kind of the first time I've talked about it to someone for a couple months. I think it's more the fact that he knew me before… The others didn't. I was kind of scared he'd judge. But I didn't show anything of it. And it did seem kind of natural talking to him, it always had been. So I went on…

''And my dad was innocent just so you know. He didn't do anything of what the media and all the others said he did. He was framed. The… the Grayson's did this to him.'' He looke startled. I shouldn't tell him all of this, he wouldn't believe me… but I couldn't stop now.

''The Graysons. The Graysons like the Dan Grayson you were about to marry is that it? Why would you marry him if he destroyed your family. I know there's forgivness but…''

''Amanda wasn't about to marry Dan. Emily was. I've been planning this for so long now.'' I just couldn't stop telling him everything and keep going on… I hope I wasn't going to regret it. ''I've been planning a long time to make things right, to bring things to justice.''

''Are you sure that's a good idea…You could get into lots of trouble…'' he was concerned.

''One hundred percent.'' I told him my face cold as ice. ''As I said… I've been planning… They hurt my family so bad Jack… made me go through so much I can't let them get along with it. I'm sorry if it's not quite the way you remember me but that's what they made me.''

''But you can't get your dad back… and I'm pretty sure this isn't what he'd want for you…''

''I can't get him back. But I can get my mom back.'' I shot at him. ''Oh, sorry…Did I not mention she wasn't really dead? And that Victoria has known for all these years because she had an affair with my dad?'' I think I better stop talking now, this was making me a little upset. ''Sorry… I didn't mean to sound so…''

''Don't worry…'' We were so close. I didn't realize until now because he tilted his head towards me and gently pressed his smooth lips to mine. My heart started racing like crazy. I felt my legs weaken a little. I put my hands on his chest, needing to stop this right now, but had lots of trouble to… I got back to myself a few seconds after and backed a little.

I looked down. I didn't like what I was about to say. ''I'm sorry Jack… I can't let feelings stop me right now.'' It felt so bad. ''I have to concentrate on finding my mother. I'm so close and I can't be blinded by … love. I'm really really sorry…''

He seemed to understand. But what I understood is that it made him sad. He gave a little kiss on my forehead. ''Ok… Anyways, I'm going to head home now. Bye Emily.'' He said with a sad smile.

I went straight inside and dialed the number I've called so often in the last few months. ''Nolan… I really need a friend right now….'' I was trying to stay strong again.

He was here only a few minutes later. He looked at me with those understanding eyes of his and gave me a little smile. I couldnt keep it in a second longer as he came to take me in his arms. I started sobbing helplessly. He held me hard, rubbing my back and waited.

''I…. I love him Nolan. A… And I just pushed him away… What am I going to do… I can't get him into this… he can't get hurt…. I care too much about him….'' I said as I was searching for air.

''Don't worry Ems. You're going to figure this out like you always do. But if my advice helps in any way, I'd tell you that love doesn't always come both ends… and when it does, you should take your chances…'' He was taking care of me like a big brother would. I'm so thankful to have him.

_-x-_

I guess I fell asleep in Nolan's arms crying… and he was to scared to wake me up so he just stayed here. I somehow felt much better than last night.

Since I didn't get lots of time to work on it last night I took my mother's letter in my hands and looked at it. Concentrated so hard. Nolan woke up and offered to help, to which I didn't resist at all. He didn't seem to get it more than I did and it discouraged me a little so I decided to go for a walk on the beach to think about it instead. This house was only taking my thoughts back to last night and Nolan went back home.

**Jack :**

Why is it not a surprise to me that I didn't sleep of the night? Last night was wonderful. Well, I've got to say I'm really not sure what she has planned, but I'm sure it's no good I'm sure it will just end up hurting someone somehow. But I also know that I want to be with her through it all, I don't want to lose her again. And it's not like the Grayson's were in my heart that much, even less with what Emily told me last night… Maybe what they've got coming to them is totally well deserved after all.

I still can't believe I was so blind. She's still got familiar looks after all. But when you don't know I guess you just don't look for it. Well, there's a surprise…

''Nolan….'' I grunted. How could he just hide this from me all along? I know we're not like… best buddy's or anything but I still consider him a really good friend, I thought he did too.

''Jack… I know you're mad for Emily/Amanda and etcetera but let's move on ok?'' Nolan said with a huge smile, too huge. ''Emily called me last night…She is like soooooo bad at making good choices, and I'm pretty damn sure the one she made last night isn't the one she really wants. So, go talk to her alrright?'' He smiled again giving me a friendly tap on the back and walking away, not even giving me a chance to speak a word.

Now, it was my turn to make a choice. Should I listen to her or to Nolan? My heart would obviously tell me to do what Nolan said, but you know… maybe I would really only be in her way…

_-x-_

I didn't realize I was now walking on the beach until I stopped walking. I didn't know if I should keep going or just go back to the bar. There she was, a few hundred feet away, but I could easily recognize her gentle walking with her hips moving slightly as she walked slowly. Still arguing with myself, I didn't know what to do. She told me she didn't want to see me, but Nolan on the other hand doesn't think that's what she really wants, so I think I'm going to give it another try. I've got nothing to lose after all.

_**-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-**_

_****_**So? What do you think about this? **

**Thanks for reading :) review please ! **


End file.
